Sunday, October 18, 2009

what say you?

ok, since i'm at a computer quickly i HAVE to post this and i am asking anyone who reads this to please give feedback, especially if they are Christian OR have a loved one in prison.

my initial purpose of this blog was to relieve tension and stress about my life as a wife to an inmate and a mother to 3 active children. it was also to show others the ups and downs of prisonlife and parenthood. as it's grown though, it's become a conglomerate of the above and also a blog about my life in general, including frugality, my personal growth and some key points of who i am *a lover of animals, pro-life, etc.*. i will admit, because i am somewhat anonymous here, i feel comfortable enough to speak my heart on many things, and it's a huge relief to just let it all out when it seems like i can't speak to any other people about something in particular that i am going through. this is especially helpful when i can't speak to my hubby because of phone, letter or visit restrictions too. and even then, there are alot of things that i haven't let it *although i sure do wish i could lol*, because i feel like they are private just between he and i and/or our family.

now, i was told by a fellow Christian here that my blog is sinful in that i am revealing too much about my marriage, not being very Proverbian at all in my wifeliness. aside from one set of posts that revealed a series of problems we were going through *and actually worked through*, i don't find any posts especially *sinful*. but because i'm intrigued and definitely need to know if i'm sinning *so i can fix it because what we do not know isn't held against us but what we do know is*, i would like to know what others think about this accusation, in light of what they have read here thus far and even moreso if my blog is sinful in any way.

but please note, i made an exception for my blogposts from 2008, when i was a very different person than i am now *still a Christian but not as studious in the faith as i am now. this blog was even under another name then, it was not a Proverbs wife's life*. i did make mention to said Christian that what i have posted in my earlier writings on this blog *from the summer of 2008 mainly* are older postings of an older me and are not indicative of who i am now. these postings are not often and although they are secular in nature, still aren't extremely explicit or straight out crazy. but i kept these postings as a true confession of my growth as a Christian and a person. i feel that if i edit this diary of mine it won't be accurate of who i was and who i am. i am not ashamed of those postings because they are in the past, and in God i am made new. so i don't linger on them, nor do i hide who i *used* to be.

i stated this to said Christian, and i wonder if she deliberately used that information to create a post designed to accuse me of sinning. hmm. i wonder this especially because she immediately directed her comment concerning my various postings in this blog, and i wonder if she would have thought to do that on her own had i not mentioned my older musings first.

so at this point in time, i am not sure if the remark from her was a rebuttal to the comment that i posted to her or if it was given in genuine concern about the fact that i *may* be sinning (and i use that term lightly insofar as her remarks to me are concerned). but i'd like to get some comments on this all.

what do you see when you read this blog? can you see some changes in my demeanor and attitude *alot of people say they can in my regular non-online life* or are there no differences? are my old postings compared to my 2009 postings useful in seeing this change, if any? am i sinning and don't know it? am i ok? is there anything that you as a reader of this blog *and i know there aren't that many but still* think i should know?

what say you?


Jean said...

Hi girl

I read your blog a few weeks ago after you commented on my blog. I actually enjoyed it, and found it interesting. I love your home, its cute, your girls are beautiful, I have a 5 year old girl.

I loved your style of writting because you write from the heart, and I think you are so brave and you are strong woman to cope which your situation the way you have. I dont know if I would cope, to be honest, I cant even think about it. My heart bleeds for you, and I see you miss him dearly. You are a young woman and I commend you for your bravery, I dont think I am as strong as you, I would break down if I was seperated from my husband.

I did not say your blog was sinful, and its not wrong to say your other half is in prison. All our blogs are sinful to some degree, we are all sinners so perfect blogs dont exist.

I will be to the point, according to the scriptures we should not talk about what goes on on our marriage bed. Example, I do not explain in detail to anyone what goes on in my bedroon, I believe its between me and my husband alone. Talking about my bedroom and what my husband and I do to each other is a form of pornography. Sex is a gift from God and it is only meant to be shared between husband and wife, be it verbally, on the phone, physcically or whatever way. Anything outside that is defiling the marriage bed. I understand your frustrations because he is not with you, I too am a young woman (27) so girl I understand, and I think you two are doing great, from what you write, but still it does not exuse the fact that the marriage bed is to be kept pure. Thats what I was trying to say but did not want to have to go into the gory details, if I did on my blog that would have started something else and diverted from the topic.

Much love


Jean said...

Just to let you know I deleted the comments from my blog, I think here is the best place to discuss it if you wish.

I am speaking from past experiances and I am pointing this to you because I care, thats all.

Much Love


a Proverbs wife said...

thank you for your comments, jean. :) i am sure the posts that i wrote before concerning any sexual activities are from the old blog, and not this one. i sort of figured they were what you were speaking about, and i combed over them and decided to keep them up there as a testimony of then and now. they aren't overtly sexual in nature nor are they very detailed *actually* lol.

thanks for your concern and your honesty...i am trying to figure out a way to decipher from the old blog to the new one, but i guess i'll just have to continue to explain literally for anyone who is concerned about it.

thanks again for visiting my blog and being honest with me.