frustration.

tonight, i am SO frustrated. it's one of those nights where i just WISH...i just wish SO much...that i had everything i wanted, when i wanted it. i don't want to wait for anything. i don't want to wait for anyone. i want what i want and i want it now. today was such a great day, but suddenly, like a sudden thunderstorm, my whole mood changed. i went from just fine--to just not fine. nothing provoked it, nothing out of the ordinary happened. i was good...now i'm not.

i want my friend to pay me attention NOW.

i want my husband to be home NOW.

i want my business to be successful NOW.

i want 1,000,000.00 NOW (i'm not greedy).

i want sex NOW.

i want a huge home in a quiet area NOW.

i am mad. i feel like a child in a toy store who can't have the toys she wants MOST.

i feel like kicking, screaming, and crying on the floor.

i am just FRUSTRATED. and i am having trouble releasing it in a healthy, sane, and safe way.

maybe tomorrow will be better.